Tag Archives: comedy

Spirited Debate

17 Mar

“Oh yes,” said the congresswoman, stepping forward and cracking her knuckles. “I love a good old-fashioned debate.” So she stepped into the fray with her opponent, and delivered a short, sharp opening statement to his jaw.

The senator seemed unfazed, launching right into his first argument, which slammed her first in the face, then in the stomach, and finished with overhand, ham-fisted rhetoric to her back.

Rhetoric it was, but he did have a point. The congresswoman’s retort was swift; she drove her counterpoint home with a painful rebuttal between his legs. An alternate proposal followed, which swept the senator off his feet. While her opponent was down, the congresswoman pounced upon him, seizing an opening. Her arguments pummeled him mercilessly… every defense he made crumbled under the force of her logic, and she dodged around his every attempt to get a word in edgewise.

Time to finish it. The congresswoman pulled back, took a deep breath, and brought the point home for her closing. The senator’s nose yielded the floor as he withdrew from the debate entirely, conceding to her wisdom by virtue of losing consciousness rather than furthering logical discussion.

The congresswoman smiled with triumph. “See?” she said. “And you thought debates were boring.”

THE FOURTH WALL

16 Dec

THE FOURTH WALL

A terrible short story about terrible short stories, by BHS

It was a dark and stormy night.

            Protagonist fumed to himself as he stomped down the streets of the city of Setting, grasping his umbrella tightly. Didn’t the Author just have to start him off with the most cliché opening line in history? That alone was enough to put him in a bad mood… the first bad mood of his so-far very brief existence. His temperament did not improve as he further considered his position. Who was he, really? Where was Setting? Where did the umbrella come from? He didn’t know; he had only been created several sentences ago. All he had were his clothes, his raincoat, the umbrella, and some vague sense that there was a plot device coming up soon. Until then, he would just have to follow the Author’s direction. Realizing this did nothing to improve his mood.

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